Hello everyone! It’s time for another guest post. This week’s amazing writer is Deborah Cherrey, who I met not too long ago but was immediately impressed with. I was drawn to Deborah because she shares some of my highest goals: supporting and empowering women! If you’ve been with EEA for a while now, you know how important it is to me to build a life that I love, and to encourage others to do the same. As a mindset coach, this is one of Deborah’s specialties. So without further ado, I’ll let her share some of her awesomeness:

Lean Into Self Love

Love……it’s the highest vibrational state of being. The BEST feeling in the world. To be operating in space of love. It’s something that we offer our partners, our kids, our family and even complete strangers. Sadly, it’s something that we often overlook for ourselves.

When you marry someone, you vow to love them unconditionally. You pledge a lifetime of love for better or worse, for richer or poorer, in sickness and in health until death do us part. How often do we make those same commitments to ourselves?

My journey to self love began several years ago.

I was feeling lost, broken and was in a downward spiral. I distinctly remember looking into the mirror, peering into my own eyes wondering where my vibrancy had gone. I saw emptiness, I saw darkness, I saw sadness.

I wasn’t taking care of myself, finding solace in bottles of wine. I was making poor decisions that didn’t honour my highest self. To this day, it’s still a difficult admission. Most people were fooled by the mask I wore day to day. Perhaps I should have been an actress.

There’s the adage saying that everything happens in the right timing. An opportunity to go to Bali on a self love retreat was staring at me on my computer screen and I knew in the moment, as tears streamed down my face, that if I didn’t go, if I didn’t choose me, if something didn’t change, that my life would be heading in the wrong direction.

When you decide to choose you and take full responsibility for everything in your life, it’s going to be uncomfortable. On that journey of rediscovery, you will be forced to look at aspects of yourself that you don’t particularly like. Facing those dark spaces that are long buried within is where the true healing begins. Acknowledging them and the emotions that they stir. Forgiving them and then letting them go. Having kindness and compassion for yourself and accepting that we only know what we know at any given time. Recognizing that our experiences help shape us. When we know better, we do better. We always have the opportunity to choose again.

“You can search throughout the entire universe for someone who is more deserving of your love and affection than you are yourself, and that person is not to be found anywhere. You yourself, as much as anybody in the entire universe deserve your love and affection.” — Buddha

Self love is not a one quick fix. There is no miracle cure or magic wand. It’s a continuous journey of discovery while navigating the dance of life. It’s a commitment that you make to yourself every single day. It’s prioritizing your self care so that you can step into the best version of yourself, to show up authentically and shine your light. Self love is choosing life on your terms and never settling for less than your heart’s desire.

There was a wedding ceremony in Bali where I married myself. I put on a beautiful white sundress and in front of a small group of people, I looked into a mirror and in a shaky voice read the vows that I wrote for myself:

“I vow to honour my power and my truth and live based on continued growth and evolvement.

I vow to choose me and make decisions based on what is best for me and my highest self.

I vow to operate from a place of love, kindness and gratitude.

I vow to fall more and more in love with myself every day for the rest of my life and demand that same love from everyone else in my life.

I vow to never, ever settle for less than my heart and soul’s desire.

I vow to listen to my intuition and learn to trust its’ guidance.

I vow to honour my mind, body and soul nourishing all with healthy food and exercise.

I vow to inspire others to do the same sharing love and light with every person I meet.”

It was a profound moment that forever changed my life for the better. I framed those vows and bought myself my own wedding ring. Together, they serve as a constant reminder of my decision to take control of my life.

The best and most difficult decision will be to choose you, your life and your happiness.

Are you willing to lean into self love?